Do you feel as though you are walking on eggshells in your home? Do you think before you speak to avoid yet another confrontation with your husband? Have you ever wondered “Why is my husband so angry”?
Living with an angry spouse is stressful. The days can be full of heightened awareness and high levels of anxiety.
An Angry Husband is Not Your Fault
The first thing to know and understand is that your husband’s anger is NOT your fault. He may say the contrary, but that is the aggression talking. If your husband is angry, if he seems to live life angry, or on the brink of anger, there is some underlying issue that he has not addressed.
Your husband’s anger is a like a mask for some unmet need. It could be a need from childhood that never got met, a need for love, maybe a need for security. His unmet needs manifested into anger as he did not know how to process those feelings and emotions.
His anger is his issue. His tactics and manipulations have nothing to do with you, even though it feels like an attack at your very core. That anger is his obstacle to address.
Life with an Angry Husband
When your husband is angry, tell yourself it isn’t about you (even though it may feel like it is). The anger he is displaying isn’t even about the situation you were talking about when the argument began. It’s his underlying issue resurfacing, again and again.
When your partner is angry, don’t feed the anger with your own anger. Let him rant while you remain calm. When you speak, talk only about the emotions, and not about the behavior or the person – – “I can see you’re angry. Can you tell my why?”
You don’t have to listen to every rant or every angry outburst. You are not responsible for “fixing” the issue. You can walk away if you need a respite from the situation.
Couples Counseling in Washington, PA
Living with an angry husband can reduce your quality of life. It’s not on you as his spouse to keep him from getting angry. Living with verbal abuse will cause damage to your own self-worth.
You don’t have to live a life of chaos, anger and tears. Couples counseling is extremely helpful when both partners are willing to go. It’s not uncommon, though, for a person to refuse to get help.
Luckily couples counseling isn’t the only way to help you and your relationship. Individual therapy can work on ways to approach problems in your marriage that will help you. We can work on ways to improve your communication so you are heard, understood, and subsequently, help you feel empowered.
If you are living with an angry husband please don’t hesitate to call us at (724) 503-6670 to schedule an appointment.
If you have any questions or would like to get to know us a little better, please email us at admin@inthenowcounseling.org.
