Last week I talked about appreciating the little things in life. I talked about why it’s important to live in the moment and not live life for the big moments. Today I want to expand on that and work on finding joy within us, in our daily life.
Happiness is our body’s response to a situation. We smile and laugh when we are happy. We look forward to those moments, those events that bring us happiness.
The drawback of living life for happy moments is that it’s an external emotion. It’s dependent on external factors…time, places, people and events. If our happiness is lived during life’s big moments (vacations, buying houses, having a baby), we don’t spend much time being happy. Vacations end, houses aren’t new forever, and having a baby requires a lifetime commitment of love and care.
That’s why it’s important to focus on finding joy in daily life, in the little moments each and every day.
Finding Happiness or Joy in Daily Life
We can look for happiness, but we choose joy.
Happiness is an emotion. It’s the raw, unfiltered response to a situation. Emotions come and go. When we hear our babies laugh, it makes us smile. That’s happiness. It’s a response to an external factor.
Feelings, however, involve our thought processes. Feelings are a choice based on our thoughts. When our baby laughs, we smile. And while we smile, if we look inward, we may notice the feeling of pure love we have for our child. We feel that love, that energy, and that sense of peace. This is joy.
When we seek joy in life, we can find inner peace and calm that is above happiness. Joy isn’t conditional. We choose joy, or we don’t. But, it is our choice. Let’s work on choosing joy for a more fulfilling life.
How to Find Joy in Daily Life
Joy is natural. Look at any child and you will see joy. Children are joy. They are joy in its purest form. Their joy hasn’t been contaminated by life’s ups and down, wins or losses, as it has for many adults.
As adults, many of us have lost our joy and instead, we look for happiness to fill that void. We don’t enjoy our job, so we look forward to the weekend. And when the weekend is over, we look forward to the next event. We don’t have to live life for those fleeting happy moments. If we learn to choose joy, we can live a more fulfilled life.
You can experience joy at any point in life.
To experience joy, slow down and focus on your feelings. Focus on your body from your head to your toes.
There are moments of joy in nearly every moment of each day – – seeing your teen smile, hearing a baby laugh, feeling the sun on your face, taking a walk with your dog, sitting down to dinner with your family. When you experience these moments, check in with yourself. What do you feel inside when you experience joy?
Do you feel the spread of warmth in your body. Where did it start? Do you sense your body relax and feel more peace?
Finding joy can reduce the amount of time we spend on negative emotions. Our mental health improves and we are able to process negative emotions effectively so we don’t spend excess time with feelings of negativity or disappointment.
Look at the tiny moments to feel joy.
It may be difficult to find joy when you feel your life hasn’t gone to plan. You may feel let down or hurt by another. You may not feel that sense of happiness, but you can still find joy in the micro-moments of daily life.
Try eliminating clutter. That may be mental clutter, or physical clutter. Talking helps eliminate mental clutter. And reducing/donating stuff can help reduce the physical obstacles that help us find peace.
When we reduce the excess, we can get a better sense of what matters. Those little moments – – a hug from a partner or child, coffee shared with a friend, a quiet morning walk, a “How was your day?” with genuine interest, etc, make up our lives. If we focus on those little moments, they become far more important. What was once an inconsequential moment of the day can become far more valuable. Your life can be fuller. Not with stuff, but with internal joy.
You can still enjoy a family vacation, but your focus may change from the prime beach location to the joy in seeing your child’s face when he/she experiences the ocean for the first time.
This fall season, let’s work on checking in with ourselves and look to the tiny moments of joy. Focus on those moments and watch them grow.
Therapy for Women in Canonsburg, PA
If you’ve been feeling unfilled, you’re not alone. It can seem like there is no easy road to happiness or joy. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Take time for you. Talking helps.
If you’re ready to find joy in daily life, or if you’d like to get to know us a little better, please call (724) 503-6670 or email us at admin@inthenowcounseling.org.
You can also talk to us on Facebook and Instagram, too.
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